Do you think you need assistance with the terrible twos?
For pretty much every parent out there, outside of health issues, one of the first major parental challenges to be faced is when your child goes through the Terrible Twos stage. Almost overnight it seems as though your delightful little toddler somehow changes their personality completely, learns how to throw a toddler temper tantrum and starts yelling at you in defiance of just about everything!
The terrible twos can truly be a tough stage and the majority of parents suffer many emotions, frustrations and even feelings of complete helplessness. If you are struggling to make it through the terrible twos stage, take a close look at my top 5 indicators listed below and see if you may need some help.
Check these 5 signs to see if you need help with the terrible twos…
1) Always Yelling At Your Kids
Does every conversation with the terrible twos toddler seem to be at high volume? Do you feel that all you seem to do is yell at your child in the desperation and frustration of trying to get them to do what you need them to do?
This is extremely common and just about EVERY parent has been there! Whenever we can’t get our message across, we often resort back to yelling and raised voices in an attempt to win back control. Unfortunately, the terrible twos toddlers seem to get energy from this conflict and will often start yelling back at you!
2) Feeling Guilty After Altercations
It is completely natural to feel guilty or a little upset after having an argument or fight with your toddler. The question you have to ask yourself here is how often are you having these guilty feelings?
Some disagreements are unavoidable and a part of parenting however if you are having those feelings of guilt and regret far too often then this is a major sign that communication with the terrible twos toddler is not going well.
3) Seeing Your Own Behavior Reflected In Your Children
This one is a real “biggie” and for me personally was one of the things that really made me sit up and take notice of my own parenting and realize that I had a problem which needed help to be sorted out.
As a frustrated parent going through the terrible twos stage, I was obviously displaying many behaviors and actions that really were only doing harm. Our children learn from us and mimic us and to my horror, I started to hear the same “catch phrases” and arguments I would use, coming out of my children’s mouths. Even more hurtful was the way my two beautiful boys would smack or threaten each other.
I am the first to admit, I used to do things badly but watching the way my two boys interacted with myself, my wife and each other, showing the same behaviors and actions I had inadvertently taught them really cut me deep.
3 Signs down – how are you going so far? Need help with the terrible twos?
Indicators 4 and 5 are where we really start to get serious about getting some assistance. If you are regularly seeing the next two signs in yours and your toddlers life then please take notice as you could be doing great damage to not only your relationships with your children but also your own emotional stability.
4) Feeling Frustrated And Helpless
This one is one of the most common signs that you need help with the terrible twos stage.
I remember it myself before I learned how to control the situation and the memories of my wife and I sitting around the dinner table after another failed meal time feeling extremely frustrated, stressed, angry, drained and an overall consuming feeling of helplessness are still there. Rest assured, you are not the only one experiencing the terrible twos stage to question yourself and your parenting skills!
5) Hitting or Lashing Out At Your Children
This is pretty much the biggest sign that you are not coping and need to learn some new skills and strategies to help you deal with the terrible twos!
Now we are not talking about the “To smack or not to smack” debate here but more so the element of losing control and lashing out. These occasions are normally spur of the moment and come out of extreme anger and helpless frustration. Pushing over, kicking, hitting, multiple strike smacking and even shaking your toddler is NEVER acceptable behavior. If you feel that you are guilty of this type of discipline then I thoroughly recommend that you stop, reassess and review the way you are parenting your child or children.
At the end of the day, dealing with the terrible twos (as well as that year or two on each side!) is all about communication. If you need help, I really can recommend no better program to help you communicate with your toddler than the amazing Talking To Toddlers program. Click the image below to check out their site (as I did some time ago) and learn how you can replace frustration with satisfaction and tears of sadness to tears of joy!
You can do it too! Check it out for yourself, control the terrible twos and get back to enjoying your family!
Best of luck – Cameron
Click for help with the terrible twos!
