Children process their world differently than we do. All of their senses are strong, and sometimes words are not enough. Positive parenting means understanding that all of your child’s senses help them understand their world. So, the next time you want to tell your child something important, don’t just tell them about it. Show them, as well.
Take this example: Your daughter’s room is a mess. You explain you’d like her to clean her room so it looks nice. Now, show her what you mean. Muss up your hair and rumple your clothes, do something silly like put a pair of socks on your head. “See! Mommy is a mess! Do I like looking like this?” Odds are, your daughter will giggle and say no. Now, straighten yourself up and put on a big smile. “This looks and feels so much better, doesn’t it”. Keep playing the game, and you’re making the point that tidy is better, while sharing a nice laugh with your child. It may seem silly, but your child is learning why being tidy is better than being messy.
If your son is dumping sand out of his sandbox, ask him why. If he says he’s having fun scooping, suggest he scoop water in the sink instead. Then, have some fun by scooping him up in your arms and carrying him to the kitchen. You have diverted his attention from something that was making a mess, and you have given him an alternative. By scooping him up, you have also made him laugh, and used your actions to support your words. The next time he feels like scooping, he will remember your game, and head for the sink.
Having fun and making your child laugh can be a successful and positive way to help them remember what you’re saying.
If you yell at your child, they will be frightening, confused and even angry. This doesn’t help them remember what they should do the next time. Instead, they associate negative feelings to the task, or to you, and this battle will resurface.
Try using fun to reinforce a positive message, and that listening to Mommy or Daddy can mean a new game.
Children need to be told what you would like them to do, or what they need to stop doing. But words can be hard to process. Their brains are still wired to take in all kinds of sensory information.
Positive parenting means understanding how your child’s brain works, and using that to help better communicate. So a great parenting tip is to tell your child what you expect or want, and then find a way to show them exactly what you mean, hopefully in a way that brings out one of their glorious smiles.
If you would like to read more about “Positive Discipline for Children” and how knowing how your child learns can help you teach good behaviour, you can do so here http://www.positivedisciplineforchildren.com




